Magically Switched
by GoddessOfTheCarries
Summary: What happens when someone behind the scenes messes with magic and causes a certain Vastaya couple to switch bodies and souls with two hunter cats? Let's just say chaos ensue as they try desperately to reverse this. Xayah/Rakan and Nidalee/Rengar mainly, with many other ships throughout. Rated M for adult references and language.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone, it's Frosty's first attempt at a comedy that will hopefully make you all laugh a bit. Personally I'm rather stressed with some damn project IRL now, so I wanted a good laugh myself, and writing this will probably help levitate my stress a bit. XD**

 **It's a shitty attempt at writing comedy, so do review to tell me what do you think XD**

 **Also a lot of shipping here, as usual.**

 **Anyway, hope you all have some fun reading this :D**

* * *

Kumungu. There was where Nidalee was supposed to be. The jungle was her home, and she had pretty much gotten used to seeing the leafy canopy of trees and hearing the sounds of wild birds chirping every morning she woke up, since this was where she had been pretty much her whole life.

That was why she was now staring confusedly at a ceiling that shouldn't belong there.

It wasn't just that; instead of laying on the jungle floor, which was normally damp and usually lined with fallen leaves, she was now in a bed - the kind that real humans used. Which meant that she was technically in a house, which didn't make any sense at all.

 _How did I get here?_

As she pondered over why in the world had she appeared in someone's bed instead of the familiar jungle she was used to, she suddenly felt the presence of another soul in the room. With a jolt of shock she turned to see someone in the bed next to her. The sleeping figure was not entirely human either - he had a wing with bright golden feathers and a pair of sharp ears. The creature resembled both a bird and a human, and Nidalee wondered if he was one of her kind as well.

What was awkward was that part of his wing feathers were actually draped over her. She also noticed (maybe a little late) that he had one arm wrapped around her own, which was when she first felt his touch. She had been too preoccupied with her surroundings to notice at first.

Her movements had somehow awoken the bird-human hybrid too. "Another day... damn the sunlight..."

"Um... hey. Who are you?" Her voice came out a little bit more shaky and confused than she would have liked it.

The hybrid's eyes shot open at the sound of her voice. "Wait, where am I? Why - " Before Nidalee could give any response, he threw off the sheets covering the rest of his body, and rose to his full height with a look of pure horror.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?"

Nidalee tried to get up the same way that he had done - only to find something dragging behind her back. She lifted a hand to examine her back - and it came into contact with feathers.

Purple feathers.

With a look not too far from what the other birdlike creature had just made, she dashed straight for the bathroom and slammed the door open, staring at the mirror with her jaws dropped.

Two long, pointed ears grew from her head and a long wing lined with purple feathers was right behind her.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON IN HERE!?"

* * *

Xayah usually woke up next to Rakan.

The pair was usually together – they were living together as a couple after all. They were currently staying in the Institute Of War, serving the League Of Legends as champions. They had just joined a week ago – and the Institute had given them a room together.

So it was extra surprising for Xayah to find herself awake with Rakan missing from her side in an unknown place.

She immediately felt for her feather daggers at her side – only to find them missing. Shocked, Xayah got up from the ground to find her wing missing.

"What the fuck!?" She didn't care if anyone would hear her. Her normally lighter-toned skin was replaced with a darker shade of it, and her usual outfit was gone. In fact, she was wearing only enough to cover the vital parts of her body.

And instead of her usual feather blades, a long javelin was laying beside her on the ground.

Who the fuck have I become!?

"XAYAH!"

The sound of an unfamiliar voice calling her name almost scared her to death. She instinctively reached for her feathers, only to remember they weren't there.

At the same time, another creature came out from the trees. He closely resembled a cat, with white fur and only one good eye. He had a hunting knife and wore a necklace made out of bones of animals. "XAYAH!" He yelled again.

"STOP!" She yelled to him. "Who are you!?"

"I know I do not look like Rakan, but I am! Gods, this body is damn ugly! Where are my wing feathers!?"

"Rakan, it's me, Xayah. I know I do not look like it either-"

"Babe! Are you alright!?" Rakan-but-not-Rakan came closer to her. She was starting to think this was some nightmare they were still in.

"I'm fine…it's just I am not at all used to this body. Not at all."

"We gotta get out of here and find our own bodies back!"

"Let's go back to the League and check."

"Rakan out!" Rakan tried to dance his way out like he normally would – but he ended up crashing into a tree, being unused to his new body.

"Ugh... this is going to be a long day..."

* * *

"So... you're Nidalee."

"I never expected to wake up right next to you, Rengar... even as whoever this "Xayah" is. Ugh, I've never felt my voice this unusual."

"You're not alone."

"BUT WHY THE FUCK ARE WE IN HERE?"

"Do you really expect me to know!? Damnit!"

"We have to get help." Nidalee got up, the weight of her new wing dragging her down and making her usual graceful and feline movements awkward. She actually almost crashed into the wall, at which Rengar stifled a laugh.

"From who, though? This has never happened before. And why us? Why the couple?" He asked, a little bit more seriously this time.

"Lets assume its someone fucking us up from the League. We should probably go out and check."

"Wait! Did we fuck -"

"RENGAR! I DID NOTHING OF THE SORT I WAS STILL THE REAL NIDALEE WHEN I SLEPT OK?"

"Uh... hehe, alright." Even in his new body, the hunter blushed at the stupid comment he made. Nidalee facepalmed.

"Whatever, let's go -" She ended up tripping over the doormat and crashing to the ground again, Rengar unable to hold back his laughter this time.

"Shut the fuck up!"

* * *

 **"Xayah, The Rebel and Rakan, The Charmer, you have been summoned."**

"...WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?" They both unknowingly cried in unison.

"Hey guys! You're going for a match too? Wait for me!" The tiny yordle named Teemo came up to them.

 _This is not good... this is definitely NOT good..._

* * *

 **So that's the end of the first chapter. Yeah, it's not supposed to make sense. XD  
**

 **See you guys next chapter!**

 **~Frosty**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi, I'm back. Prepare for more bullshit to come your way. If you have decided that you do not want to read a whole chapter of nonsense, do not continue. If you want to see all the ships, do proceed. XD**

 **Enjoy.**

* * *

"Shit," Xayah muttered as she heard the summoners call for them. " _Shit_."

"Damn it! They are missing my spectacular show!" Rakan complained. His voice sounded really, really unsettling in this new body. So did hers.

"What should we do now? We can't get into the match with them."

"I thought you said the plan was "ask someone for help"."

"I'm pretty sure I did not say that," Xayah retorted. Out of habit, she leaned closer to Rakan as they walked into the Institute. Surprisingly, no one stopped them. _Does that mean these two are champions too?_

She noticed a lot of the other champions and summoners in the League were staring at them as they walked through the hallways, trying to find someone who can possibly help them. Xayah spotted a few of them smiling and giving them naughty stares. Only right then she realized with embarrassment that she had forgotten she was in another champion's body, and so was Rakan.

"Uh... why are they staring at us?"

"Because we aren't us," she hissed at him. "And try to tone it down, will you?"

"Anything for you, babe." He grinned, and even in this body he managed to look stupid... but adorable for Xayah.

Upon reaching the cafeteria, she caught sight of a match going on in the broadcasting crystals. Much to her horror, she saw her own self and Rakan being teleported onto the rift, both wearing looks of matching confusion and some sort of fear. _So that explains it,_ she thought. _Someone is indeed behind all this. When I find him out, he's gonna pay..._

"Darn it! I miss my spectacular golden feathers! What shall we do now, honey?"

"Well... we watch, I guess?"

* * *

Nidalee had never been more clueless in her life.

"Seriously, I have no idea what to fucking do." She whispered to Rengar. "As if I do," he snorted.

"You are damn unhelpful." She growled in her new, strange voice. Just knowing that she had no ability to morph into her cougar form right now was terribly uncomfortable for her. She only watched helplessly as the rest of her team were summoned, and the enemy team as well.

"Damn, this would have been an easy lane to fight as my real form..." Rengar muttered.

"Try fighting them directly, for once." It was her turn to snort. "I'm an assassin too, and I don't find them that easy to gank."

Sure enough, their enemy laners - Kalista and Nami - were known for their deadly combos. Nidalee personally find it rather annoying to have to fight them - especially over either Dragons or Baron since they almost always won the objective, thanks to Kalista's Rend ability. She sometimes even found it impossible to actually assist her laners - especially when they were too far behind.

So she actually watched rather anxiously as Rengar and her were teleported to the Rift. She was unused to using any other summoner spell other than Flash and Smite, and to get any other starting item as well. She could tell Rengar was feeling the same. Their summoners were letting them move freely. Apparently this pair was known for their coordination and did not need summoner assistance over their movement and ability control - as well as many other champions out there.

However, Kalista and Nami did not need summoner assistance either. That meant they definitely worked together really well. By the looks of it, they might even be friends. No, more than friends, from her observation. Every time they successfully retreated from a kill or won an objective, the knowing smile that they shared said too much.

Nidalee walked over to the brush and triggered her first ability, but instead of her familiar javelin, she tossed out two sharp feathers, which actually surprised her and made her jump back. Rengar was startled and actually lost his footing in the brush, too.

"Don't act so surprised, would you?" He growled. "Do whatever a ranged carry would do."

"And what about you -" She didn't get to finish the sentence before Rengar spotted Nami emerging from the opposite brush and immediately tried to leap on her. "Wait you stupid dumbass! You don't have your passive anymore!" She growled. His attempts at trying to attack the Marai only ended with him getting autoattacked back by her due to her longer range.

"Seriously, stay back and use your abilities for once."

"How about you help me by using yours!?"

"I'm just about as clueless as you are right now," she snapped. More out of frustration rather than mistake, she activated the ability again, the projectiles missing the enemy support completely. She flashed a look of surprise before retreating further.

"Darn it! Can't you aim at all?! This thing is a lot faster moving than your damn javelin!"

"YOU TRY DOING THIS WHEN ALL YOU HAVE DONE IS AIMING ONE SKILLSHOT FOR YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AND WITH MOST OF YOUR TIME IN MELEE FORM." Nidalee roared and this had obviously not gone unnoticed by the enemy duo. Kalista looked as confused and even shocked as Nami did, her bond with her support now made. Luckily they couldn't hear all that clearly what they were saying.

"And do you understand how hard is it when you can't even leap from brush anymore? Who the fuck is even behind all this?" Rengar roared back.

"Goddamn, just try not to act stupid, ok -" Nidalee didn't finish the sentence as she heard a sound. The sound of her opponents already leveling up. She sighed.

The enemy duo still looked confused and rather unsure of them, but they stayed at a safe distance while farming. Nidalee tried to last hit the minions as best as she could, but still ended up constantly missing and making the feathers fly the wrong directions.

"For fuck's sake, just try to get back to the normal level," she snapped at Rengar, still prowling in the brush. As if he didn't hear her, the stupid cat leaped straight out of brush with his new ability, but missed them entirely. Nidalee roared in frustration as she saw Nami trying to turn around the "attempted" engage, successfully catching him with her Aqua Prison.

Nidalee really, _really_ wished she had her assassin form back.

"Help me, would you?!" He roared as Kalista followed up, his health already dropping fast. Nidalee walked up to the river, and Rengar leaped at her - all too suddenly for her to realize that it was a friendly ability. She roared and ended up casting her Flash in her panic, causing her to crash into the wall, pain jarring through her new body. Rengar, who was now disrupted from his jump target, lost his balance and slammed into the opposite side of the wall as well.

Nidalee thought she could hear the enemy duo laughing. _Well, hopefully whoever_ _they_ _are they won't kill us out of embarrassment..._

"What the fuck was that!?" But before she could answer that question, the enemy jungler Kindred came over the wall and had her arrows aimed straight at Nidalee. Normally she would have turned into her cougar form and ran away from her, but as she tried to activate her usual Pounce ability, she had summoned a storm of feathers around her and Rengar.

 _How does the marksmen even live here?_ She looked at Kindred, then glanced at Kalista, still too far away to follow up. She had to give them more recognition next time. Nami was nowhere to be found. She decided to just go along with it, firing her newly empowered auto-attacks at the enemy jungler, feeling a speed boost go through her as well. _Maybe this is not so bad -_

"Oh my fucking god!" Rengar yelled as he somehow triggered his new ultimate ability, which Nidalee still had no idea what it was called or what it did, but he ran forward and somehow caught the Kindred by surprise. Nidalee cast her own ultimate, which was supposed to fire feathers in front of her, but somehow she had missed her target entirely. The initial surprise allowed Rengar to get a few hits, but that was all. A stream of healing water flew out of the brush and allowed the Kindred to leap away while returning fire.

"For fucks sake, just use a damn ward!" Rengar did, only to be greeted by a spear to the face. Probably out of panic, the stupid cat had hit the Blast Cone in the wrong direction, throwing him further away into the enemy jungle.

Nidalee almost screamed out of frustration.

Without actually thinking what she was doing, she fired all of her abilities possible into the brush where all three enemy champions were currently residing in. In a frenzy, she actually managed to root all three of them while taking away huge amounts of health, as they were all relatively weak targets. That had gave Rengar the time to get back to their own side of the jungle.

"Get over the fucking wall you idiot!" He yelled as the root wore off.

"I just landed a triple root you fucking dumbass," she roared back as she moved out of the way, quickly feeling that she wouldn't live any longer once Kalista's Pierce ability came back up, which will enable her to close the final distance. With Nami's speed boost, there was no chance of outplaying them right now, especially when Kindred was already dropping her to a really low health.

Nidalee closed her eyes in dismay as the enemy marksman leapt up with a spear thrown into her. Very soon she will land the last autoattack and her Rend will simply end her. She had a feeling that the fight had lasted way longer than it should. Maybe they were having some fun with them... but doesn't that mean they know?

The fatal blow, however, never connected. She moved back a few steps and saw Rengar knocking up the three of her assailants before leaping back to her, a shield given to herself. Nidalee stared in awe as they retreated and stayed in the river brush.

 _Wait... Rengar saved me? That was fucking reckless... but he did it..._

"What are you looking at?" He snapped. "That probably rivals what you've just done, bitch. Now shut the fuck up and get back to base."

However, as she and Rengar both channeled their recalls, summoner magic that gave them their second passive had forced them into a synchronized recall, and Nidalee found herself moving closer to Rengar, both involuntarily and voluntarily -

 _What am I thinking!?_ She mentally scolded herself. Despite her efforts to move away, she found that she couldn't (and maybe wouldn't) due to the passive which was built in for the two supposed-to-be lovers and tried to hide the blush on her face as her new feathers came closer to Rengar's, their hands even almost touching -

Luckily and unluckily, a projectile fired over the wall and shattered Nidalee's train of thought... as well as both of their health bars as Kalista's Pierce was enough to finish the two low-health champions in one-hit.

 **"Enemy double kill!"**

 _GODDAMN IT!_ That was what Nidalee screamed to herself mentally before she heard the Kindred's voice saying almost teasingly: "Didn't you know that bush was warded?" And a blurred image of Kalista and Nami recalling together with affectionate looks and the Kindred moving up beside them to join in, sharing a victorious smile.

* * *

"I can't take this anymore!" Xayah roared in frustration. Whoever that was controlling her body was making her look outright _terrible_ on the Rift. Rakan's real body was not doing much good. This will definitely not end well for the side of their team... and also for their own sake.

"I can't believe someone is making me look so stupid! I can't die looking like this!" Her partner yelled dramatically.

"We have to find them immediately. Catch them when the match ends." She growled as she got up.

But before they could exit the place for more than ten seconds... another announcement was immediately heard.

 **"Nidalee, The Bestial Huntress and Rengar, The Pridestalker, you are to be scheduled for the next match. Please get yourself ready by the time the current game ends."**

"Hey!" A small yordle came up to them - something Xayah hated a lot - and greeted them. "You two are going in the next match? Well, I'm on your team too, apparently! My summoner checked the schedule. Come on, the match is almost ended!" The female yordle energetically continued on her way, with the two Vastaya hesitating before reluctantly following along.

 _Why does everything have to delay me?_

* * *

 **There's the end of chapter 2. I laughed really hard at the double kill scene myself, even though it never really happened IRL XD I just thought it will be incredibly hilarious when I placed it together. And yes, it indeed was.**

 **So, see you all next chapter, I hope you enjoyed!**

 **~Frosty**


End file.
